You’re a fan of stylish shades and dapper hats. You like to riff on the electric piano. You’ll take 3 orange whips. Basically, you’re a pretty hip cat — and you think that means you know the Blues Brothers.
Shame on you.
There’s much more to brothers Jake and Elwood than their bravado and devotion to dry toast. In fact, only one thing truly reveals the heart and soul of these shining diamonds: their car insurance.
What’s that? You had no idea the Blues Brothers were so responsible? Well, that’s because they didn’t want you to (they do have an image to maintain). But the truth is, they wouldn’t be much without their trusty Bluesmobile — a beloved stray fleet member of the Mount Prospect, Illinois, police department loaded with “a cop motor, cop tires, cop suspension, cop shocks,” and one busted cigarette lighter. And without the right insurance, of course, the Bluesmobile wouldn’t be much either.
So, in the spirit of our Insuring Famous Rides series, here’s a glimpse of the covert coverages that really helped our boys “get the band back together” and the (imaginary) deleted scenes where they kicked into action. Of course, these real-life coverages would never, ever (ever!) provide protection for the antics below … but hey, “I say we give the Blues Brothers one more chance.”
Insuring famous rides: the Bluesmobile
“Shake Your Moneymaker”: personal umbrella insurance
What we saw
Fleeing the police in the Bluesmobile, Elwood goes from circling a mall parking lot to … circling inside the mall. What follows is a giddy few minutes of sensational destruction in which the boys, uh, accidentally leave no Miss Piggy, Pier 1 import, or early arriving new Oldsmobile undemolished.
The enraged mall owner shows up at Elwood’s apartment brandishing a baseball bat, which he promises to use if the boys don’t pay millions for the property damage they caused. Luckily, they purchased umbrella insurance, which provides up to $10 million in backup liability protection. They happily jot down their insurance info and, 3 sax solos later, send the man on his way.
“I’m Walkin’”: medical payments coverage
What we saw
Scrambling into the Bluesmobile for a mad dash to Chicago, Elwood looks to Jake and sums up their situation: “It’s 106 miles to Chicago. We’ve got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes; it’s dark, and we’re wearing sunglasses.” “Hit it,” Jake replies, and they speed off.
Driving in the dark with sunglasses proves exceedingly difficult and they slam their famous ride into a tree almost immediately. They’d be laid up for days with injuries (and a ruined mission) if it weren’t for their medical payments coverage miraculously getting them back on their feet. Now that’s something to dance about!
“I Can’t Turn You Loose”: comprehensive coverage
What we saw
After yet another epic chase, the boys arrive at Daley Plaza in Chicago to use the money they raised with the band in a positive way: to pay off the back taxes for the Catholic home where they grew up. As they exit the Bluesmobile, it literally crumbles into a heap.
Unable to cope with the loss, a sobbing Jake lies atop the fallen Bluesmobile and declares that he’ll remain there in mourning, playing a wistful harmonica tune, for a period of no less than 2 weeks. Elwood kindly informs his brother that their comprehensive coverage will replace their totaled Bluesmobile with a new one. Crisis averted, they carry on to the tax office.
“Think”: how to insure the Bluesmobile
Clearly, the Blues Brothers drove their car the same way they played their tunes: with primal energy and a blatant disregard for safety — a method we, ahem, do not recommend. At least they had the good sense to back up their motoring with savvy car insurance (even if we never knew it).
We’re guessing their premium was fairly high. But, when you’re on a mission from God, that’s a small price to pay. Here’s a look at the coverages they’d likely need:
Umbrella: $10 million
Medical payments: $10,000
Comprehensive: $250 deductible
Collision: $250 deductible
Custom parts and equipment: $4,000
Carrie Fisher protection: 1 bulletproof vest