Insuring Famous Rides: Oscars Edition

The Academy may have snubbed these rides, but we sure won’t.

Insuring Famous Rides: the Oscars Edition

Red carpets are unfurling. Gracious-loser faces are being practiced. “Sound mixing” is being googled. Just feel that pomade-coated, Botox-injected tingle in the air: it’s Oscar season, babies!

And in honor of everyone’s favorite time of year (to yell at celebs through the TV), we’ve created an Academy Awards-themed celebration of our own. But we won’t be celebrating the people from the silver screen. Instead, we’ll applaud those who have been overlooked for far too long: the vehicles. (Note: the term “vehicle” is used very loosely here.)

Here are our 5 favorite “rides” from Oscar-winning films past … and what it’d be like to (fake) insure them.

Famous ride #1: the 1966 Alfa-Romeo 1600 Spider Duetto from The Graduate, 1967

Why the Oscar buzz? This newcomer rises above shaky turns from its co-stars, Dustin Hoffman and Anne Bancroft, to deliver a stunning performance, most memorable for the tear-jerking scene in which it runs out of gas … and dies.

Best coverage in a leading role: Customized parts and equipment. With all the taboo, inter-generational seducing that goes on with passengers of this ride, you know it needs some primo window tinting for privacy.

Famous ride #2: the 1973 VW Transporter Type 2 “Microbus” from Little Miss Sunshine, 2006

Why the Oscar buzz? Pigeonholed for decades in the role of “nest for deadbeat surfers,” this iconic VW bus finally gets the chance to show its leading-vehicle chops by suddenly, unexpectedly, moving out of first gear.

Best coverage in a leading role: Emergency road service. Driving long-distance in a rickety bus that needs a sprinting push to start? This coverage is a no-brainer (as is the extra air freshener for the, uh, grandpa situation).

Famous ride #3: the 1966 Ford Thunderbird convertible from Thelma & Louise, 1991

Why the Oscar buzz? While critics agree the Thunderbird’s acting performance itself is a bit hammy and overdone, this ride demands high praise simply for doing all of its own stunts.

Best coverage in a leading role: Liability insurance. When you (and your 2 passengers) are the target of an FBI manhunt, it’s safe to say you may want some at-fault coverage.

Famous ride #4: the balloon house from Up, 2009

Why the Oscar buzz? Houses have long been a fixture in the industry — with seminal performances in films like Home Alone, Poltergeist, and The Cider House Rules — yet they’ve always been snubbed. It’s time for a lifetime-achievement award.

Best coverage in a leading role: Homeowners insurance. Because even up in the air (or on faraway cloud islands), paying for an emergency plumbing visit out of your own pocket is tough.

Best coverage in a supporting role: Collision coverage. Let’s not forget that this house is also a vehicle, and when your main navigational tool is a neon bushel of rubber and helium, it’s best to play it safe insurancewise.

Famous ride #5: the Titanic from Titanic, 1997

Why the Oscar buzz? Playing yourself in a tragic docudrama … about yourself?! Courageous.

Best coverage in a leading role: Comprehensive coverage. Does hitting an iceberg count as a natural disaster? The jury and the appraiser are still out on that.

Best coverage in a supporting role: “King of the World” insurance. Because every ship needs someone to shout these words.

Which legendary rides got the praise they deserve? Which got snubbed? Weigh in below. And check out Insuring Famous Rides: The Series for more pop-culture premiums.

*Thanks to Antoine Taveneaux for our Oscar photo.

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