As the familiar orange 1969 Dodge Charger roars down the winding gravel road with Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane in hot pursuit, the voice of Waylon Jennings greets the viewer, “Welcome … to Hazzard County.”
Dukes of Hazzard has covered many story lines and developed a number of relationships, but one thing has remained untouched: the Duke family’s choice for car insurance. (Not surprising.)
When it comes to insuring the Dukes, you’d expect the average insurance company to be more nervous than a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs. In fact, we’re pretty sure that there isn’t a local insurance agent that’d touch the high flyin’ Duke boys with a 10-foot pole. But we reckon Esurance could lend a hand.
Whether running the General Lee in an overland race or trying to get Uncle Jesse’s mortgage money to Boss Hogg’s bank before the deadline — Bo and Luke Duke always fly (sometimes literally) with the pedal to the metal.
In most cases, the General Lee clears Dry Creek without a scratch as Rosco’s Plymouth Fury ends up in the “Hazzard County Car Wash.” But don’t worry. Rosco and his beloved dog Flash (aka Velvet Ears) are no worse for wear (buckle up for safety!).
There are those times, however, when the Ol’ General gets a war wound or two. And since this is a classic 1969 Dodge Charger we’re talking about, we’d certainly refer the Duke boys to Esurance’s classic car partner, Hagerty Insurance. With a quick quote, the boys’ll have enough time to catch lunch with Cousin Daisy at the Boar’s Nest and then get some afternoon shut-eye — all while knowing their car is covered in case a claim needs to be filed.
Now there are several things we should consider when insuring the General Lee, keeping in mind that for some inexplicable reason, it never rains and is seldom dark in Hazzard.
$100,000/$300,000 (per person/per accident)
Deputy Enos has a tendency to hit a few trees when he’s chasing the Duke Boys. Possum on a gumbush, he may get hurt!
Liability — property damage
$100,000 (per accident)
Those construction workers are constantly claiming damage caused when the Dukes use that handy dirt ramp for a quick getaway (through the air).
$100 Deductible/$0 Glass deductible
Although storms are unlikely in Hazzard, the possibility of windshield damage exists — especially if the bad guys’ Chevy Nova kicks up some rocks as the Dukes chase them down before another old-fashioned (yet predictable) fist fight.
Ol’ Crazy Cooter loves the Duke Boys but he still has a business to run. And he has to charge something for towing the General back out of Tipton Swamp.
You know the saying, “Drive it like you rented it?” Bo and Luke are prime reasons why you never EVER want to buy a used rental car.
Of course, the Duke brothers could always borrow Uncle Jesse’s pickup. But in a pinch we could set them up with a rented 2012 Charger. Ever wonder what a new Charger would look like with a CB antenna on the trunk? That’s a big 10-4, Lost Sheep.
As we all know, the General Lee is a long way off from stock. Custom wheels, the Dixie horn, brush guard, and of course the famous orange paint job — this would be a good coverage to have so Cooter can get the General back on the road, much to the chagrin of Boss and Rosco.
Some parting thoughts
Dukes of Hazzard may not have ever mentioned car insurance, but in the state of Georgia liability insurance is mandatory. To think the Duke family doesn’t have insurance is unlikely. After all, that’s just a little bit more than the law would allow.
Keep it between the ditches, y’all!